Parappa's Sick Day but with Hetalia Characters
(America calls Japan on the phone.) America: How do you do, fellow gamer? Japan: Hello, fellow gamer. America: Japan, are you alright? Japan: Nah- what?! Me? Not feeling alright?! Pfft. America: Alright then,,,, see you later. (America hangs up his phone.) Japan: Me being sick? Ain't happening, buster. (Japan gets into a coughing frenzy.) Japan: Nah, I'm fine! (Seychelles barges in) Seychelles: I heard you were sick. Japan: I'm not sick, sis! Seychelles: There, there. No need to get worked up. Just get plenty of bed rest, okay? Japan: Sis! Seychelles! I'm tellin 'ya the truth! I am NOT sick! Gamers like me DON'T GET SICK! Seychelles: Okay, I'll ask Papa to get some medicine! Japan: (internally) oh god oh frick (Japan runs away before Seychelles returns.) Seychelles: Before you know you'll get super sick! Trust me! (Cut to Japan, America and Italy riding down town on bikes. Japan doesn't seem to be paying attention to the roads.) America: Sure is nice of Czech to invite us over for a picnic, eh, Italy? Italy: I hope she made lotsa spaghetti! America: Japan, are you sure you're alright? You look a little queasy. Japan: What are you talking about? I'm as fit as ever. (The gang passes a lake.) America: Hey guys, check out that lake! Italy: Oh, cool! (glances over to Japan) Uhh... you okay? Japan: Of course! America: ....Hokay, whatever you say.. (chuckles nervously) (America and Italy stop their bikes while Japan keeps going) America: Um, Japan, you should stop your bike, your gonna- (Japan falls in the lake) America: (Panicking) DROWN! Italy: !nonooo (America runs to the edge of the lake and peers in. He notices that Japan doesn't seem to be making any attempts to come back to the surface.) America: Oh god, I gotta save him! (America dives in after him.) Japan: (In his head) This is it, the end. (America grabs Japan and drags him back to the surface.) Japan: Oh wait, I lived! (America and Italy look at eachother with concerning looks as Japan goes into a coughing frenzy.) Japan: Oh jeez, I might've swallowed some water. America: Maybe we should take you home. (Japan doesn't say anything.) Italy: Yeah. We'll save you some spaghetti. Japan: Guys I'm fine, no need to worry about me. Now, lets hurry up! (Japan runs off) America: He's totally sick. Soon he'll get super sick and will need our aid. (Italy is suddenly wearing a plague doctor outfit.) America: Oh, don't be so dramatic. Italy: Just being safe. (Cut to: Czech, Belgium and Hungary on a field. Japan rushes on screen two seconds later) Japan: Hiya girls! How are you on this fine day? Czech: Great! I made lotsa spaghetti! (Italy silently rejoices.) Belgium: Japan, you're here! Hungary: You and America are soaking wet! Czech: Yeah, what happened? America: Well, you see- Japan: We went swimming. America: (Facepalms) No, he nearly drowned! He made no effort to come back up and I had to save him! Honestly I believe he's si- Japan: No no no! I'm not sick at all! Belgium: Japan, you almost drowned!? Oh dear! (Belgium hugs Japan, Japan insanely blushes) America: I was thinking I could take him home before something like that happens again. Japan: No need to worry, guys! I'm o- (Sneezes like wild) (Everyone looks at each other, extremely concerned for Japan.) (Italy starts handing out plague doctor masks to the girls.) America: Italy, cut it out. Hungary: I think you should go home and rest, Japan. Japan: How many times do you have to tell you guys: I'M FINE! (Japan, insanely mad, walks away from the others.) America: Japan! (America runs after him.) Italy: I'll take some spaghetti to him. (Italy follows them with some spaghetti, with the girls following Italy as well.) (Cut to: Japan in the woods.) Japan: Forget them, I'm a lone wolf! I need nobo- (Japan coughs so much he falls on the ground.) Japan: -dy (faints) (America runs up to him) America: Japan! (America takes him up) America: I got you, buddy. Czech: Jeez, we better call the hospital. They might know what to do. America: Who's gonna make the call? Belgium: I will! (Belgium calls the hospital. A few moments later, an ambulance comes and picks up Japan.) Italy: They didn't let him take his spaghetti with him. Hungary: Okay, you can shut up about spaghetti now. Italy: Bit's dead? Hungary: Bit's dead. Czech: What do we do now? America: Maybe we should tell his family. They deserve to know. (Cut to: Japan's house) Seychelles: No! Not big brother! I must see him! Hungary: The hospital said he can't have visitors until tomorrow. Seychelles: Well, he's my brother! I'm gonna go no Americaer what! (Seychelles runs out the house to the hospital.) Hungary: Seychelles, wait! They won't let you in anyway! (Hungary runs after her.) Italy: Aw geez, more running. (Cut to: The hospital. Seychelles sneaks past the doctors and runs into Japan's room.) Seychelles: Big brother! Japan: Sis! (has a coughing fit) Seychelles: Oh, big brother, I feel just awful for you! Japan: You were right. I WAS sick, I just kept denying it. Seychelles: Why did you have to do that? We just wanted to help you. (Before Japan can respond, 3 doctors burst in the room.) Iceland: Hey, you can't be here! Seychelles: Hey, he's my brother! Share some mercy to pup like me, won't ya? Denmark (!peggle2): (grim voice) No mercy. Seychelles: What the, why? Norway: Yeah sorry, but if you don't leave, we will get sued to death forever. You know how it is. Seychelles: No I don't, I'm a child! Please let me stay! Iceland: Leave, now. Seychelles: I..... I refuse! Denmark: I'm calling security. (Iceland whispers something to Denmark.) Denmark: I have been informed that we can't call security on an unattended small child, so I calling your parents. Denmark: ... Denmark: What's your parents' number? (Seychelles says nothing until Hungary appears in the doorway.) (Denmark turns to her.) Denmark: No mercy! Norway: God, shut up Denmark. Iceland: Which one of you clowns left the door open? (Hungary punches each of the doctors in the face.) Hungary: Seychelles, get out! You're gonna be in serious trouble! Denmark: Okay, now I can call security! And the police! (Hungary grabs Seychelles by the hand and bolts out the door and down the hall.) Denmark: Funny chase scene time? Norway: I hate you, Denmark. (Cut to: Out side the building; The cops are on their way.) Hungary: We're toast! We better find another way around..... (The hospital security guards show up behind them) Seychelles: !nonooo (Italy appears out of nowhere) Italy: (PtR PJ voice) PASTAAAAAAA! (Italy launches spaghetti at the guards' faces.) Hungary: Everyone run! (The three escape.) Iceland: Dang it, Denmark. Denmark: Well, you let them go, Iceland! Norway: You let them go, Denmark! Iceland: Forget you, Norway. Norway: Whatever. (Cut to: Japan's house.) America: What were you thinking, Seychelles!? Seychelles: (In tears) I'm sorry! I just wanted to see my brother. I love him so much, I couldn't bear to leave him alone! Czech: Jeez, calm down America. America: I'm sorry... Hungary: Sure was lucky that Italy was there, right gang? Belgium: Yep. Seychelles: Hey, why can't we help Japan get back to normal health, starting tomorrow? Italy: What can we do that the doctors can't? Czech: Provide moral support, of course! Italy: Oh, right. Seychelles: Well, we just GOTTA BELIEVE! (The house erupts into hearty chants of "We gotta believe") (Cut to: Where ever the frick Prussia is) Prussia: Austria! Do we have any Doritos? I need some epic gamer fuel here! Austria: But you're not even playing anything! Prussia: I NEED DORITOS! Austria: Aw geez, boss, we don't got any! Prussia: Incredible! My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined. Austria: I'm sorry. Prussia: This is your fault, idiot. Austria: Hey, why don't we make up for it by ruining someone else's day? Prussia: That's a great idea! Now where can we find some miserable people to hurt? Austria: Why not those kids we keep messing with? Prussia: Well, of course! Austria: Gee, where do you think they are? Prussia: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh idk let's just go find em'. Austria: Of course! You're so smart, boss. (Cut to Japan's living room again.) (Prussia and Austria crashes through the ceiling.) Prussia: hey lol i'm here to ruin everything (The gang groans angrily.) Seychelles: Hey can you leave? We're trying to think how to cure big brother from his sickness! Prussia: Ooh, what's that? Poor ol' Japan caught some sniffles? Austria: Okay, this is epic. Seychelles: No! He's seriously sick, and stuck in the hospital! Austria: Okay, this is epic! Czech: You guys are real messed up in the head, you know that? Hungary: Is anyone gonna mention that these guys put a huge hole in the ceiling? Like, who's gonna pay for that? America: Hey Prussia, frick off Prussia: thenperish.jpg Seychelles: no u Austria: no u 2 Belgium: Shut the heck off, idiot Prussia: Ok bye. (Prussia and Austria crashes through thee ceiling but in REVERSE) Seychelles: .....should we follow them? Hungary: Why? Where would they be going? Belgium: They know Japan is in the hospital! What if they find him and try to hurt him? Czech: Japan could be insanely hurt! We should make sure he isn't hurt! America: We better hurry, before Japan's in danger! (Meanwhile, at the hospital) (We see twelve straight seconds of Japan lying still in bed.) Japan: I hate this place. (Prussia and Austria, as shadows, appear behinds Japan's bed.) Austria: (whispering to Prussia) What're we gonna do to 'im? Prussia: (whispering to Austria) What? I told you to come up with something while we were running over here! Austria: (whispering to Prussia) Aw geez, I forgot. Prussia: (whispering to Austria) Gash dangit! No Doritos for you tonight! Austria: (whispering to Prussia) Sorry, boss. Japan: (Turning around) Huh? Who's there? Prussia: (whispering to Austria) Hold on, I got this. (Prussia pops out wearing a doctor's coat and holding a clipboard.) Prussia: Heya! It's me, Mister Doctor! I was just looking over your lab results, and oof, are they quite troubling. It appears we may have to diagnose you with... uhh... (peers at clipboard) Failing Pneumonia! Japan: Failing Pneumonia!? Prussia: Yep, that's what I said. (Austria comes out, also in a doctor's uniform.) Austria: I'm here, too. Japan: Oh jeez, I'm screwed! Do you have any cures? Prussia: There is one treatment... but it's highly experimental and potentially unsafe. Japan: Am I gonna make it, doc? Prussia: Do you have health insurance? (Japan stops to think for a moment.) Japan: I believe my dad does, so come on, gimme the cure! Prussia: Excellent. Austria: Nyeheheh! (Taiwan swings the door open and walks in.) Taiwan: Who the heck are you guys? Austria: Aw, snap. Japan: !! What !! Anyways, hurry, man! Prussia: Umm... we transferred in from another county? Taiwan: ...mmkay. (leaves) Japan: So I can get the treatment? Prussia: Huh? Oh, sure, sure. Japan: Oh, joy! When can I get visitors again, though? Prussia: Never! If anyone comes anywhere near you, they're done for! Austria: Dead! Japan: What about you two? Prussia: Um... (Prussia fumbles around for a moment, then snaps on a face mask and clears his throat.) Prussia: Anyway... (Prussia locks the door, closes the blinds, and prepares the "cure".) Austria: Experimental treatment! (Austria sneezes.) Prussia: Dude, put your mask on. Cmon, don't be gross. (Austria complies dejectedly.) Prussia: Anyway, uhhh, take this. (Prussia tosses a huge pill at Japan, who replies by swallowing it.) Prussia: (To himself) Yes, yes, yes! Japan: What? Prussia: Oh, nothing. Japan: Oh ok. Prussia: Great! You should start recovering in about three months. Japan: Three months!? Austria: Yep, that's what he said! Japan: Aw, geez... (Cut to Japan's friends bursting through the front doors of the hospital.) (We see them at the receptionist's desk. She points them in the right direction.) (They stop to converse with a doctor in the hallway.) (They come into Japan's hospital room.) Prussia: Crud! Austria: Okay, time to go. (Prussia and Austria make their way to the exit, but some of them block the way.) America: You are not going anywhere on our watch, you two! Japan: Alright, Whats going on? Prussia: Let us through, or I will call security! Czech: Shut Up Prussia. You're not even a doctor! You just have a doctor coat on! Prussia: Dang it, you got me.... (Prussia and Austria rip of the coats.) Austria: Gee, how did they know it was us? Hungary: We can still see your faces, idiots! Japan: What? The doctors were Prussia and Austria this whole time? Italy: Honestly, how did you not notice? Japan: My... my vision is blurry. (Belgium runs up to his bedside.) Japan: Miss Belgium, I don't feel so good... what was that pill I took? Belgium: Pill? (Everyone glares at Prussia and Austria) Seychelles: What did you do to him!? Prussia: I'm not telling! Nyeh nyeh nyeh! America: Tell is or you will get 7 across your face! Austria: Seven what? America: I am gonna slap you, but I will not if you tell us what you did to Japan. Prussia: Can't you just slap Austria instead? Austria: Hey! America: Nope. Now tell us: WHAT. DID. YOU. DO. TO. Japan? (Prussia stand still and silent for a while. Then suddenly he starts breakdancing. Japan's friends look at him bewildered. Austria takes the opportunity to run out of the room, accidentally dropping the pill bottle as he runs away. America picks up the pill bottle and starts reading it.) America: "Evil Mind Control Pills That Make You Evil"? Italy: Why does that even exist? America: (Shrugs) I don't know, but this is gonna be wild! Belgium: We gotta get that pill out of Japan before it takes affect! Czech: What if it's already too late? Hungary: We are doomed. America: We gotta get Japan to throw up, and fast! Belgium: Gross. Hungary: But how? America: Look guys I do not have all the answers! (Italy seizes another pill bottle from a medical cart. Its label reads "Pills That Make You Throw Up".) America: That's... awfully conveinent. Czech: This place is weird. (Japan suddenly stands up in his bed, fully alert and with swirly mind-control eyes.) Japan: Rise and grind, gamers, let's kill some people! America: Japan NO Belgium: We were to late! (Everyone in the room starts to panic minus Seychelles and Japan) Seychelles: Japan...... (Japan falls face first out of his hospital bed onto the floor.) Japan: Ouch, my bones. (Seychelles runs over to Japan) Seychelles: Big brother, are you ok? America: Seychelles NO! (Japan doesn't do anything.) Italy: Did he died? America: Don't even joke about that. (Japan gets up with a jolt and sprints out of there.) Seychelles: Japan NO! (Seychelles chases after Japan.) Italy: Great, more running. (Japan has a giant butcher's knife now.) America: Whadda heck, where did that come from? (Seychelles runs the OPPOSITE direction to the cart, and grabs the bottle for "Pills That Make You Throw Up") Hungary: What are you doing? Seychelles: I have an idea! (Seychelles opens the lid and throws the pills at Japan; He swallows one and barfs up the mind control pill.) Hungary: Okay, this is nasty. (Seychelles, Belgium, and America go to comfort Japan.) Seychelles: It is alright, Japan. Belgium: Every little thing will be alright. America: Come on, stay strong, buddy! Japan: My bones still hurt. Belgium: Let's get him back in bed. (Belgium and America carry him onto his hospital bed.) Prussia: Dang it! Italy: !thenperish Germany: (sees Prussia) Hey, whadda heck? Get out of here, you weirdo. Prussia: no u (Germany tosses Prussia and Austria out the window. They land on the bushes below.) Austria: ouchies (Finland comes Japan's hospital room.) Finland: Good news: Japan is good enough to leave the hospital! (Japan's friends celebrate.) America: Let's go home, buddy! (The gang walk out of the hospital together.) (Cut to: Wherever Prussia and Austria are THIS TIME) (They're both having a sneezing fit.) Prussia: This is your fault. You didn't put on your face mask in time! Austria: You didn't have yours on for a while, either. Prussia: No Doritos for you tonight! Austria: We don't have any Doritos, though. Prussia: Shut up! Anyways, we will get those pesky kids NEXT TIME! (Prussia laughs but then coughs like crazy.) (The words "to be continued" appear on screen as the episode ends.) Category:Parappa the Rapper Category:Hetalia Category:Shitposting Category:Pages by Tornadospeed